CXIV: Want To Help The Person In Your Life Who Is Studying For The Bar Exam?
Families everywhere are completely changed one of two times a year when the law student in their lives get ready for the Bar Exam. This post will [hopefully] help families everywhere navigate this difficult time.
It’s very hard for someone to explain to family members and friends what it’s like to prepare, each day, for something like the bar exam. People everywhere try to liken it to their finals or midterms for their undergraduate program or their masters program, and while I commend you all for going to school, it’s simply not the same. So hopefully these tips will shine a little light on the situation so that all of the loving family members who surround the bar exam takers can be a bit more understanding and apply a bit less outside pressure to the upcoming bar exam takers.
TIP NUMBER ONE: Keep The Calls/Texts/Emails/Etc. To A Minimum.
Studying is something that, for some, it is really hard to wake up each day motivated enough to do. For those of us who struggle to get up and get it done in the first place, distractions like constant phone calls or text messages will only further slow us down.
Also, if the bar exam taker is anything like me, he/she is very close to her family, so being allowed to turn their phone off may not be an option that’s open to them. So, in this instance, I guess the family can make some sort of a trade-off with the bar exam taker to call less if the studier in their life will agree to actually keep their phone on. Either way, let your tester have the time away from their phone that they need. I promise they miss you, but right now is not the time for them.
If compulsion compels you to reach out, then simply send words of encouragement or a $5 coffee card. During this time just use your words as encouragement and assistance. Those are the things that your tester needs more than anything!
TIP NUMBER TWO: Try Not To Lean On Or Depend On Your Tester Until The Storm Ends.
The Studier in your life is under big stress and bigger pressure. So much so that they’re working tirelessly in the hopes that once is the only time that they’ll be studying for this God-awful exam! So, if those surrounding the Studier could just put on their ‘understanding’ hats and not depend on the Studier for about two months, that would save the bar exam taker a world of stress!
TIP NUMBER THREE: Put Those Cooking Skills To Work.
Studying consumes you the closer you get to the Bar Exam, so your Studier may be forgetting things like eating and sleeping. If you’re anywhere near your Studier and can supply them with one simple meal during their studies, I can promise you that will fuel them to study another day! It may even improve the study day that they’re already having.
Some bar exam takers stress eat while they study and others are already on a budget from the costs of taking the bar (and not working while studying for the bar) and simply can’t afford things as necessary as food. Be their savior and cook them a meal or two!
They may even need a break from studying and offer to sit down and eat it with you! BUT, you should definitely offer either way.
TIP NUMBER FOUR: Try Not To Remind Them That Life Is Happening While They’re Locked Away.
Studying for the bar exam is being in a different world. The only thing that matters in that world is understanding the law…. all of the law. So, outside life is simply not something that can be added to or mentioned in our memory banks. We just can’t handle anything extra! The information overload that happens while studying for the bar is extreme.
If you’ve ever honestly felt like your brain just couldn’t hold anymore information, then multiply that by 1,000 and you’ve got a taste of what it is to study for the bar exam. Keep anything that is not directly related to our studies away from us. I promise, it’ll save your Studier one brain explosion during their studies.
TIP NUMBER FIVE: ALLOW YOUR STUDIER TO BE SELFISH.
This is a period of time for your Studier that you definitely have to allow them the time to be completely selfish.
For two months, we honestly don’t have the capacity to care about your bills because most of us can’t even pay ours; we don’t care about your midterms or finals because literally hearing the words ‘test’ and ‘exam’ makes our stomachs turn; and finally, we really want to go outside but we simply can’t, so keep the offers to a minimum.
Instead, schedule outings for after the bar exam! Plan to take your Tester out. An outing that they didn’t have to schedule would truly be the best after-exam treat.
All in all your Studier needs you in a different way during this time of their lives. For some, we need words of encouragement. For others, we need random (but short) outings. And, for many, we just need one less stress.
Hopefully this post helps you navigate this difficult time in your Studier’s life and happy studying to the February Bar Takers.