LXXX:... Would I Have Any Regrets?
Life is unpredictable, and I oftentimes wonder if I’d have any regrets should I reach my last day.
Have I done everything that I’ve wanted? Did I say everything that I needed to everyone in my life? Did I love as hard as I could? And do the people that I love, appreciate, and admire know that I love, appreciate and admire them?
Would I regret the fact that I haven’t even made it through half of my Bucketlist? Would I regret the fact that I have never found my passion?
I’ve always made it a point to try and live the life that I want. I’ve always walked to the beat of my own drum, I’ve used myself as a gauge for my progress and growth, and I’ve given my all to my friendships and relationships.
These are the things that I take the most pride in. But would others know that I’ve done all that I could to be a force for good in their lives? Would they know that I did all that I could to be the best friend, love, cousin, sister, daughter that I could possibly be? Would they know?
Would I feel that I’ve done all that I could in this life? Would I be able to say that I’ve touched enough lives? Have I been a good love to someone? Have I been a disappointment to someone? I have no clue, but there are a couple of things that I do know. 🤔
In this life, I’ve:
I: Seen Paris
II: Fallen In Love With Washington D.C.
III: Had Love, Many Times
🙄, Let’s be real! I’ve loved many times but was it returned? Obviously not considering the way they all go.
The goal is always to love and be loved, but Let’s Be Real, as we move more towards an easy and selfish existence, finding love is getting to be more and more impossible. People are there for the easy and fun part of the ride but they are gone the second things become work —- and this is definitely not love.
So, I doubt that I’ve experienced a returned or even real love, but I have definitely loved someone and there’s no greater [or scarier] feeling. 💕
IV: Had Bestfriends Galore
V: Eaten A Ton
VI: Seen Seattle
VII: Walked Through Huge Trees and Beautiful Snow In Virginia
VIII: Learned To Ride A Bike(Twice)/Longboard
Now, things with wheels, apart from cars, are obviously not for me, but I like getting out there and trying new things. And, who could’ve known that seeing new cities by bike or longboard could be so exciting?!
IX: Been A Wrestler
X: Been/Am A Ballet Dancer
My secret love that no one gets to see me do. 😉
Sometimes you just need something that’s all yours.
XI: Been To du mussée du Louvre
XII: Had Many Regrets
So many people that I regret associating with; so much love that I regret giving; and so much pain that I regret causing and so much pain that I regret giving my time. But, without any of these things, I wouldn’t have learned so many lessons.
I’ll keep the past regrets, but I’m definitely on a mission to do better ALWAYS.
This post is just a reminder to myself to always say what I feel, do what I want, and love as hard as I possibly can. A lot of things and people in this world have turned me off to love and friendship in general, but I know that my love is valuable, my friendship is one-of-a-kind, and I am hilarious to be around.
Those who have chosen to walk out of my life and/or treat me wrong have chosen to do so solely on their own. BUT I REFUSE TO LET THEM BE THE REASON THAT I LEAVE THIS WORLD WITH ANY REGRETS.
So, have I found my true love? No.
Have I effected the amount of change on this world that I set out to? No.
Have I found my passion yet? No.
But, have I traveled, loved, smiled, eaten, and been unapologetically me? Absolutely.
So basically, I would gladly leave this world with no regrets. I hope you all can say the same. 🖤